Podcast: Portmansheau

Episode 648: Duck Hunt sweaters are confusing. About as confusing as the Project Blue Beam UFO’s flying around New Jersey. Is this a sign of the apocalypse? Or is it bird flu? We’ll plumb the depths of the oceanic shelves to find out. Chopped carrots, potatoes, surprise pickles, and the burnt ends.

Episode 647: Our heroes have returned from their travels abroad! What tribulations did they overcome? Who did they become enraged by? Were there surprise pickles, cut squash, E-Vite receipts, office chairs, organs, or nicotine pouches? Come inside dear listener and hear their tales of triumph.

Episode 646: The black ice has arrived! All the mothers have joined the chat. Licking the salt cave walls. Chinese restaurant names. Family MAGA Thanksgiving. Getting stuck on a snowy road waiting for the snow scraper. How cold is your house? What is a space blanket? We learn a new Estonian word for fullman’s butt.

Episode 645: Don’t look it up! Andrew is back and he’s got a problem with Ep644. He also has a problem with Ep643. He’s an angry little man. Probably because he isn’t playing hockey. Puke makes a 3D printed magnetic knife block. Christmas lights, should we bother? Let’s buy a seaplane. What is an amphibian?…

Episode 644: Math regret caused by microphone arrogance leads to systems thinking. How do we reduce plastic in our balls? Didi RFK Jr get tricked into eating McDonalds? (0’s era suits were awful. Stress snacking. Remember when YouTube was good? Beef Wellington. It’s time to pivot.

Episode 643: Andrew is convinced he wants to visit the greatest city in the world, San Francisco. Where was the Soviet Union? Guess the movie! What happened to the happy blacks? How many moons will smash into Earth? 42 minutes of arguing about what a “league” is.

Episode 642: Well, that happened! Obviously we talked about the election for 2 hours. But also we can’t say “umm”. Andrew learns about Peanut the squirrel. Brett wants to make a movie. Andrew still hates Musk. Puke learns about Kaczynski’s handgun.

Episode 641: Prime yourself for numbers and Jake Paul! Who is voting and why? Do we have hope or fear? Are these cat-ladies for Harris real? Why does Andrew count Trump signs while he drives? Andrew’s Tim Pool bedtime is in jeopardy. Maltodextrin in my drinks. Brett shits in a bucket. Andrew wins the hockey.…

Episode 640: Our animal stories for the week. Guessing the Great Lakes. Eating frog legs. Guessing African countries. Dead turtle in Presque Isle, PA. Guessing Southeastern Asian countries. Fabio. Tits out, dicks out is not a winning political strategy. Puke gets a nail gun! Rock against Bush. Discussing the upcoming election madness. Andrew and Gabriela…

Episode 639: Brett loves the number 9 the way a kid with down syndrome loves his lunch box. Have you watched the 90’s rom-com “You’ve Got Mail”? Did conservatives in 90’s Arkansas really hate gays? Andrew is shocked to find out, yes! Down Periscope, with the Fraser guy. Bursitis Brett. A heritage of not shitting…

Episode 638: Two hours of Tic, Tac, Toe talk! JKLOL! We try to figure out the youth lingo like hag-maxing, gooner, pie-maxing, bussin’, skibidi, salad-maxing, etc. Andrew was right to hate Pittsburgh’s cliche’ tourist restaurant, Primanti Brothers. Rap jacking. Song remix debate.

Episode 637: We argue about Rock-Paper-Scissors for two hours.

Episode 636: Brett & Gabriela have been successfully wed! Andrew played hockey, we are going to see some hockey. Who is George Floyd? Arguing politics at the wedding. Searching for coney dogs. Brevity is the soul of a good text. NO FOOD IN THE STUDIO! Eating popcorn on a plane. Harris political signs confuse and…

Episode 635: Young Alex is here to eat pickles! What are the sexual bases and why is there no home plate? Puke is the only tattoochioed one. Remembering 9/12. What is a Coney Dog? Aroma memories. Who was your childhood hero? Alex learns about space. What is spawning? Beaver tails. Are we colorblind?

Episode 634: Brett is only one week away from the bliss of being done with the marriage paperwork. Did you practice a custom signature? Puke did, and Andrew is mad about it. Is the election going to be a disaster? Will evil prevail? Are all the normies just uninformed idiots? Did one of us help…

Episode 633: A compunction for conjunctions! The shooter’s gun is revealed. Learning about tracers. It’s election season and we are filled with joy. Hyphens solve all problems. A factory for cheesecake. Gaping cloacas. Why does corn have ears? Puke is given a rabbit. The Pittsburgh wedding cookie table. Childhood ruined by apricot.

Episode 632: What do all of the numbers of guns mean? Andrew doesn’t know and this makes him cross. He thinks cars are much less confusing. Then he tells us about the time he buttered his weiner and milked his dong. Andrew learns about the details of the Trump shooting from an inside source! A…

Episode 631: We’re all back! Andrew and Puke drove around Appalachia, Brett and Gabriela drove to Maine. There was a Grand Prix, kudzu, puppies, a cave, and a hill-climb. Andrew almost died! Brett makes his own gas now. Gabriela asks about garbage microphones. Andrew yells about the Trump assassination attempt. Zucchini spirals.

Episode 630: Every ice-maker breaks at every time. Cruising Miatas on an ice cream tour of Appalachia. The stress of vacationing when Andrew. Living a post-focus life. Race video; car not skin. Taking a boat thru a lock and into a cove. Swimmer’s ear. Go buy-yak with cash only. Bird strike prevention.

Episode 629: Happy 13th birthday! Andrew is the “fuck” now. Puke upgrades the studio computer. Making a Robert Ludlum diorama. Brett nearly dies in the race Miata. Wanting to fly. War slaves. Bedding wash and bunchy dick. Brett and Gabriela watch some gay movie. Andrew drives 2800 miles in one week. Watching the “stuff” results…